Beautiful, depraved

Intimacy. Debauchery. Irreverence.

Thursday, June 22, 2006

Instigators and Demigods of Sexual Pursuit: #2

O - Story of O

Truly one of my all time favorite heroines. She starts her journey as a pretty, successful girl, has a charming lover. All is well until he throws her to the dogs, subjecting her to all number of debasements, humiliation, pain and chastisement. Slowly, as she is broken down, a beautiful chrysalis occurs. With nothing left to hold onto of her former self, she emerges totally free. There is no taboo, there is no ‘bad’ since she has experienced it all, faced it all in herself and now there is nothing left to fear.

I had a lover (well, still have) like this. He throws me into wild situations – anything that I am attached to or have any ‘preciousness’ about, he destroys. I was afraid of gaining weight. He made me gain 15 pounds. I was attached to my pretty girl hair. He shaved it off. I was intimidated by one of his other lovers. He made me eat her pussy and I fell in love with her within minutes. I have fantasies of pure exhibitionism – he puts me in rooms full of people with my cunt on display for all to view. I love group sex. He brought me 6 gorgeous, sexy people for my birthday. And so on. Although I have been apart from him for several years, I sought him out again recently. I needed a catapult into the next dimension and I knew he could help me.

What are our relationships - especially the sexual ones – if they are not catalytic in some way? I really need them to be - the arena where I can play the wildest.